With so many demands on our time, it is difficult to imagine feeling content and rested all the time. A little bit of overwhelm here, and then it can quickly stack up until it can feel too much. One of the most important things that we can do is to make sure that we take some time for ourselves. The problem with taking time for ourselves is that often; it can be accompanied by feelings of guilt. In fact, it’s something that gets to the point where people who don't block out time for themselves forget to look after their health, too. They forget to visit the chiropractor, the dentist and the optician because they’re so busy taking care of someone else. This isn’t a cycle that’s easy to break from. A cycle that is worth taking the time to break. So, how can you set aside real time for yourself or be alone with friends or a loved one?

Expression

Depending on what kind of time it is you need will change who you should speak to. If you are always with the children and you need a break, then tell your partner that you need a few hours a week alone. For those without a partner, friends and family can help. If you don’t have friends or family that can help, a reliable option can be care.com, where you can book what you need when you need it.

Guilt

Many parents feel guilty for wanting time alone because they feel that it takes time away from their children and it is leaving some responsibilities behind. But that guilt is something that will hold you back from getting the time you need to help you get what you need and then tend to the needs of others.

As the saying goes, you can’t pour from an empty cup - so do what you need to do to fill yours up.

Priority

Make a few hours a week a priority to block off yourself. Each person who takes responsibility for the children should have the opportunity to have some time to decompress. Talk about it in advance so that you can both get the most out of the time - and you can even decide to spend some of it together rather than taking separate time outs.

It is not possible for everyone to get time every week, so at a minimum, there should be room for alternation.

Work boundaries

Work takes up a lot of time, and it can even creep into your outside work time. Before you know it, work time is 90% o your day, and those hours you have outside of work don’t seem to be happening at all. Realistic boundaries in the workplace and how much work you are doing outside of standard work hours can have a huge impact on you mentally and leave you with no energy.

Purposeful Nothing

If there are limited options about what you can do in terms of getting time to yourself, start to make a conscious decision to do nothing. Put the phone away so you can’t be disturbed, make sure there are no errands that need to be done, no clubs that the children need to go for… you get the point. Doing nothing can be great for getting a little bit of rest.

Getting some you time can be one of the most powerful tools we have to make sure that we can give ourselves a mental health check-in, much of our confidence and self-esteem is tied into it, and if those need some tending to here are some tips to help: Simple Ways to Improve Your Self Esteem — Tsirona.

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